teaching bobby d how to swim in the modern world

i’d like to introduce you to my friend, he sometimes goes by the name of leonardo de vinci, especialy when he is courting. here’s a pictare of him in wonderful durham:

beatnik_bob

look at his face! it’s almost if he can understand! but he can’t.

the people of durham think they are too cool for school. so i am taking apon myself the task of educating this poor man whether he lieks it or not.

so for the first lesson on this series (you can all learn even if you’re not a wastrel from durham) i am going to introduce lenard to our first figure of popular culture who is down with the kids.

may i introduce MARGERET THATCHER!

maggy

margeret thatcher (or ‘margery’ as he is affectionately known) is a popular man in todays society. he is responsible for a number of things the yoots know and loev and commands respect among them.

here’s a few facts:

-became president of england in 1977 after johnny rotten put down the queen in public.
-invented money, before thatcher we used to barter with sheep and grouse.
-invaded the balkland islands single handedly and took them away from maradonna after he cheated in a soccer eights final.
-invented bling.
-took cross dressing to a whole new level.
-swam the channel.
-put together the boyband ‘stock aching waterboy’.
-supported dire straights making them the first bands to sell a million laserdisks.
-strangled a pheasant.
-promoted the phrases ‘totally thatcher’ (which translates a ‘totally wicked’) and ‘thatchers britain’ (which means ‘we’re in disneyland daddy! but why are you wearing that mouse suit?’)

next up: patrick moores:

really_stupid

LOOK FORWARD TO IT!