Category Archives: Uncategorized

LJ KNOWS BEATBOX TOO!!

ching Chin, chin, China, china, chine, chino, Ch’in, chain, Chung, hing, Chan, Chen, aching, shin, Chang, chink, chins, cuing, thing, Chane, Shina, shine, shiny, Chin’s
bom bomb, boom, BM, BO, Bo, om, bum, Boy, boa, boo, bow, boy, Bob, Com, Dom, Qom, ROM, Rom, Tom, bob, bod, bog, bop, bot, com, mom, pom, tom, Bo’s
bir bier, bur, Bi, bi, Bird, Birk, Biro, bird, bit, BR, Br, Ir, BIA, Bar, Ber, bar, bio, Bib, Bic, Bil, bib, bid, big, bin, bis, biz, brr, Dir, Mir, Sir, air, cir, fir, sir, Bi’s, bi’s
rak rack, raj, rake, Ark, ark, rank, Ra, AK, Rik, rag, Rae, Ray, rah, raw, ray, RAF, RAM, Rab, Rad, Raf, Ram, Zak, oak, rad, ram, ran, rap, rat, yak, Ra’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
ching Chin, chin, China, china, chine, chino, Ch’in, chain, Chung, hing, Chan, Chen, aching, shin, Chang, chink, chins, cuing, thing, Chane, Shina, shine, shiny, Chin’s
bom bomb, boom, BM, BO, Bo, om, bum, Boy, boa, boo, bow, boy, Bob, Com, Dom, Qom, ROM, Rom, Tom, bob, bod, bog, bop, bot, com, mom, pom, tom, Bo’s
bir bier, bur, Bi, bi, Bird, Birk, Biro, bird, bit, BR, Br, Ir, BIA, Bar, Ber, bar, bio, Bib, Bic, Bil, bib, bid, big, bin, bis, biz, brr, Dir, Mir, Sir, air, cir, fir, sir, Bi’s, bi’s
rak rack, raj, rake, Ark, ark, rank, Ra, AK, Rik, rag, Rae, Ray, rah, raw, ray, RAF, RAM, Rab, Rad, Raf, Ram, Zak, oak, rad, ram, ran, rap, rat, yak, Ra’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
ching Chin, chin, China, china, chine, chino, Ch’in, chain, Chung, hing, Chan, Chen, aching, shin, Chang, chink, chins, cuing, thing, Chane, Shina, shine, shiny, Chin’s
bom bomb, boom, BM, BO, Bo, om, bum, Boy, boa, boo, bow, boy, Bob, Com, Dom, Qom, ROM, Rom, Tom, bob, bod, bog, bop, bot, com, mom, pom, tom, Bo’s
bir bier, bur, Bi, bi, Bird, Birk, Biro, bird, bit, BR, Br, Ir, BIA, Bar, Ber, bar, bio, Bib, Bic, Bil, bib, bid, big, bin, bis, biz, brr, Dir, Mir, Sir, air, cir, fir, sir, Bi’s, bi’s
rak rack, raj, rake, Ark, ark, rank, Ra, AK, Rik, rag, Rae, Ray, rah, raw, ray, RAF, RAM, Rab, Rad, Raf, Ram, Zak, oak, rad, ram, ran, rap, rat, yak, Ra’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
ching Chin, chin, China, china, chine, chino, Ch’in, chain, Chung, hing, Chan, Chen, aching, shin, Chang, chink, chins, cuing, thing, Chane, Shina, shine, shiny, Chin’s
bom bomb, boom, BM, BO, Bo, om, bum, Boy, boa, boo, bow, boy, Bob, Com, Dom, Qom, ROM, Rom, Tom, bob, bod, bog, bop, bot, com, mom, pom, tom, Bo’s
bir bier, bur, Bi, bi, Bird, Birk, Biro, bird, bit, BR, Br, Ir, BIA, Bar, Ber, bar, bio, Bib, Bic, Bil, bib, bid, big, bin, bis, biz, brr, Dir, Mir, Sir, air, cir, fir, sir, Bi’s, bi’s
rak rack, raj, rake, Ark, ark, rank, Ra, AK, Rik, rag, Rae, Ray, rah, raw, ray, RAF, RAM, Rab, Rad, Raf, Ram, Zak, oak, rad, ram, ran, rap, rat, yak, Ra’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
ching Chin, chin, China, china, chine, chino, Ch’in, chain, Chung, hing, Chan, Chen, aching, shin, Chang, chink, chins, cuing, thing, Chane, Shina, shine, shiny, Chin’s
bom bomb, boom, BM, BO, Bo, om, bum, Boy, boa, boo, bow, boy, Bob, Com, Dom, Qom, ROM, Rom, Tom, bob, bod, bog, bop, bot, com, mom, pom, tom, Bo’s
bir bier, bur, Bi, bi, Bird, Birk, Biro, bird, bit, BR, Br, Ir, BIA, Bar, Ber, bar, bio, Bib, Bic, Bil, bib, bid, big, bin, bis, biz, brr, Dir, Mir, Sir, air, cir, fir, sir, Bi’s, bi’s
rak rack, raj, rake, Ark, ark, rank, Ra, AK, Rik, rag, Rae, Ray, rah, raw, ray, RAF, RAM, Rab, Rad, Raf, Ram, Zak, oak, rad, ram, ran, rap, rat, yak, Ra’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
ching Chin, chin, China, china, chine, chino, Ch’in, chain, Chung, hing, Chan, Chen, aching, shin, Chang, chink, chins, cuing, thing, Chane, Shina, shine, shiny, Chin’s
bom bomb, boom, BM, BO, Bo, om, bum, Boy, boa, boo, bow, boy, Bob, Com, Dom, Qom, ROM, Rom, Tom, bob, bod, bog, bop, bot, com, mom, pom, tom, Bo’s
bir bier, bur, Bi, bi, Bird, Birk, Biro, bird, bit, BR, Br, Ir, BIA, Bar, Ber, bar, bio, Bib, Bic, Bil, bib, bid, big, bin, bis, biz, brr, Dir, Mir, Sir, air, cir, fir, sir, Bi’s, bi’s
rak rack, raj, rake, Ark, ark, rank, Ra, AK, Rik, rag, Rae, Ray, rah, raw, ray, RAF, RAM, Rab, Rad, Raf, Ram, Zak, oak, rad, ram, ran, rap, rat, yak, Ra’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s
tak tack, take, teak, talk, tank, task, yak, TA, Ta, ta, AK, tag, Tao, tar, tau, tax, Tab, Tad, Tam, Tan, Zak, oak, tab, tad, tam, tan, tap, tat, Ta’s

CHRISMAS HAS BEEN RUINED! FORGET IT!

i forgot to turn on my flashing L.E.D xmas lights yesterday, i’ll try again next year.

i bet timmy mallet doesn’t have these problems, no. i bet he gets up in the morning and his mallet is there with a grin on it’s face handing him a cup of tea and pointing to the xmas lights ALREADY FUCKING TURNED ON!

i need to get me a tool too. but one which doesn’t require plasters, it must cost him a fortune in boots.
Current Mood: nosey nosey
Current Music: still hybrid stuff

GRATE THINGS ABOUT THE INTARNETS #63

things/people popular over 5 years ago:

tiny badly encoded images with ropey colour.

things/people popular less than 5 years ago:

HUGE IMAGE BIGGER THAN YOUR SCREEN 6431 MILLION COLOURS! YOU CAN SEE THE ATOMS IN JIMMY NAILS FACE!
in 5 years time we will be able to feel jimmy nesbit breathing on us and see what really is inside jackie chan!
Current Mood: cockney
Current Music: hybrid stuff

You are so kind!

last Hanuka i thought up a great idea. what if, instead of unlocking bonus items in videogames, i could give more money to big corporations by buying them. this was such a great idea microsoft stole it from my brain and have implemented it in their latest ‘super-corporate-dumping-strategy’ machine, the fbox 720.

i’m not bitter that they have implemented this as i am extremely lazy and would have never got round to it myself. so to help them some more here are some more things i really want to pay them extra for:

– second player option
– paris hilton pictures
– third player option
– use of the ‘B’ button on my pad
– fourth player option
– popular music by rap and pop ‘stars’
– changing the channel on my tv
– hemorrhoids
– being fucked up the arse
– my grandma being killed by a scouser
– use of all the other buttons
– access to my toilet

hopefully by adding these ‘options’ for a fee, i can pay four times as much for each game as i don’t think i’m paying enough for them yet.
Current Mood: giving
Current Music: pillows…still

Last day of november

Oh the poor november sitting right next to december but does it get a party on it’s leaving too? no it fucking doesn’t. i’m going to change that, from now on the last day of november will be known as “THANK YOU NOVEMBER” day.

“THANK YOU NOVEMBER” day is global, so don’t think that you can get out of celebrating it, it’s for everyone like it or not. Since it is a special day it needs some special tasks to make it real. These tasks are set to change on my whim so don’t forget to check my site before every “THANK YOU NOVEMBER” day to see what is required of you.

This years tasks:

1) In the morning, the first person you meet, slap them and say “THANK YOU NOVEMBER”.

2) For lunch eat twigs and leaves in novembers’ honour.

3) Find a cat and kick it. they like it and it will remind them it’s “THANK YOU NOVEMBER” day.

4) Masturbate. As per any celebratory day. (the impotent are exempt from this the first year, after that they must use uneaten twigs to ‘prop up’)

5) Get drunk and make a pass at your sister. This way you and she will never forget “THANK YOU NOVEMBER” day.
You have your tasks: GET GO!
Current Mood: duvet
Current Music: pillows

that curly from corrie is a geezer

last night he took my tires away without asking, how did he know i had to replace them as they were bald?!?!

i guess he must of looked at them with his eyes, BUT HE IS BLIND WITHOUT HIS COMEDY GLASSES!!!

I SMELL A GHOST!
Current Mood: cat worry
Current Music: chat n shat

HELLOS!

don’t worry i am not alive, i can still bring you news and comment from the land of the dead and bored.

i’m liek a modern day angela rippon!

well it’s nearly holloween here in the UK, think your self lucky you don’t live in austrolasia where it’s nearly valentines day!

as usual us ukanians will celebrate the day of goths by buying novelty food a week before and then completely ignoring the day when it arrives (okay, we might light a pumpkin which has been moulded into the image of bob hoskins, but that’s it, we don’t even have the sex!)

the fun really comes a few days later when we burn edwardwoodwood dolls in memory of the equalizer and catholicism.

YES IT’S TONY(guy) HAWKES NIGHT!!!

i personally will be spitroasting the entire blue peter team and pissing in the onlookers coffee as they go:

OOOHHHH….AAAAHHHHH….OHHHHHHH….

and the fireworks go:

whooooooooooooooooooosh…..fizzle.
Current Mood: geraldine james
Current Music: wossy

thnak yuo snony for your pspee!

its broken. piece of shit. R button stopped working. now R = hold. grate.

SONY = QUALITEE KONTROL BY CHIMPS.

yet you arseholes keep buying their crap so the games are only released on crap. wonderful.
Current Mood: violence!
Current Music: anger

that sissy spacek is a kind cutie…

last night i was organizing my CD collection into the artists blood groups. when i was halfway through the doorbell rang to the theme of rocky IV, and when i answered nobody was there. as i started to close the door sissy pokes her head round the corner! she had been there all the time! untold.

i told her what i was up to and she offered to help.

as we were sorting i noticed she was looking at some of the CDs a little more intently than was decent, but i let it pass, as is my nature. at 3AM we were done, and i offered a back rub. she declined and said she had to get home to watch ‘third watch’ at it’s regular time slot.

as she fled out through the hallway i noticed she was bigger than i had remembered, but put it down to the fact that i was tired and my eyes thin.

the next morning i was admiring my collection only to notice that it only went down to the 5th shelf out of seven whereas the day before sorting it had filled all seven of them. it was only then that my mistake had dawned on me; only last week patrick ‘the cunt’ kielty had told me that he had caught ms spacek stealing leonard nimoy albums from the hmv that employs him. the little bitch had half-inched all my sci-fi related albums!

that’s okay though as they were shit.
Current Mood: hilltop
Current Music: lionalplasty – rhinoplasty